Turtle's Shell: April 2007

Kids in the Hall - Business Suit Trappers

This was one of my fav KitH sketches.... Sick, but funny.

Alysoun Asks...

Here's how it works: Leave me a comment saying "interview me!"- I will respond by e-mailing you five questions. I get to pick them, and you have to answer them all.- You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.- You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post - When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them 5 questions.

1) What is the single most important quality you look for in a friend?

Hmmmm..... There are several qualities I look for, but I suppose the most important would be the way they treat others.

2) When you are angered to the point of unreason, how do you not take that dangerous step? Or DO you?

Difficult question, considering where I work.... For the most part I am able to keep things under control. Occasionally, I have to act, which in the bar scenario means I have to attack people, but that's only when they attack first, and, for the most part, I keep the physical contact to a minimum. I seldom get angered to the point of unreason, but when I do, I just walk away and simmer down by myself.

3) Please describe your Perfect Day.

It starts by sleeping in as late as I want. I wake next to my lovely lady. We take our time waking up and getting ready for the day. We get cleaned up and get into a vehicle that is already gassed up, so that is not a concern. We head to one of our favorite restaurants, arriving in a timely manner, as traffic is very light, and get "porn star parking". There is no line and we are seated immediately. Lunch arrives in short order, is cooked to perfection, and is delicious. The waiter likes us, so throws dessert in for free. We then head to the local theater, again get "porn star parking", there is no line, and the movie we wish to see begins in 5 minutes. We get a soda to share, make our respective potty breaks, and go into the theater. There is a light crowd, and they are all polite, and do not talk during the show. We get there just in time for the previews to begin. The movie is all that we hoped for, and more, and we both enjoy it immensely. We head out to the car for the drive home, and there is no monstrous, green-eyed spider awaiting us beneath the visor... (Long story, but sadly, true.) We stop at the grocery on the way home, and buy something fresh to make for dinner. Again, porn star parking. Everything we want is in stock and on sale. We head home, and cook a wonderful meal. It is delicious. We then spend the rest of the evening relaxing on the couch, enjoying each others company, watching our favorite shows, or perhaps a video. We stay up as late as we like, knowing we don't have to be up at any particular time the next morning. We then head for bed. The last thing I do is listen to my wonderful lady breathing sonorously, as she drifts off to sleep.

4) $5,000,000.00 lands in your lap. Your bills and those of yournearest and dearest are already paid, your retirement fully funded.How do you spend the $5,000,000.00 and why? **note - for purposes ofthis exercise the Callahan's Answer is not in play**

Drat! Well..., since the bills and my future are already cared for... I would start by buying myself a brand new vehicle. I've never owned a new car... I would take all of my friends on an all-expense paid trip to London, to see the London production of Spamalot, with lots of time added to visit various and sundry museums. Upon returning home, I'd find 5 deserving students and anonymously pay for their education. Maybe one of them would make a difference in the world. I would NOT build the perfect SCA site, as I don't want to have to own that kind of "business", but I would donate a healthy sum to my kingdom's land fund. I would buy X-Box 360's for all of my friends, along with a copy of my game. I would give the rest to a charity(ies) that actually helps people.

5) What ONE injustice above all others would you correct, if given thepower to do so? I could only fix one?? What about our elderly who do not receive enough in benefits? DJ's who say incredibly stupid things, and get fired for it, regardless of the first amendment? Nutcases can run amok and kill 32 people, while completely sane, reliable people, ones that could have stopped it, are not allowed to carry weapons to defend themselves? Allow the coffins of our troops to be filmed and shown in the media, so this country realizes what we are losing? I think that I would return our country's children home from Iraq, so that they will quit being taken away from us. The biggest injustice is that Congress keeps them there, while only the children of 2 (TWO) congressmen are in service. Let's send our Congressmen there instead!

Well, that's it.