Pondering....
The old question occurred to me, "how does aspirin know where to go"? Well, the obvious answer is that it dissolves into the bloodstream and goes everywhere, therefore, eventually, hitting the pained area.
So, while deleting the umpteen spams in my mailbox, many regarding a great little pill that will increase the size of my "manhood", a similar question occurred. Well, how does it know? It dissolves into the bloodstream and goes to the right place. Right? But I've got other dangleys, as well. I call them fingers and toes. Do the consumers (read morons) who take these things end up with fingers twice their size, looking like Jack Skellington? Guess that gives credence to the old lie about big hands and feet, eh?
While playing City of Heroes, another thought crossed my mind. Why do all superheroes wear spandex? Is it THAT comfortable? And, if so, why aren't we all wearing it?
How about when the batteries are about to die in the remote? What do we do? We mash the buttons harder, and shake the remote at the TV, as though the extra little shrug will help.
Similar thing with elevators. We push the button and wait. If it doesn't come soon enough, we push it again. The light is on... The elevator will come when it gets there, and pushing the damn button again won't do any good! We know this! Why do we still do it? And why, do others walk up and join us in our wait, and reach down and push the call button? They can see the button is lit. Is this some kind of anti-social unspoken symbol that says, "Hi, I'm waiting too." We know you're waiting!!
Same with crosswalks. Pushing the button harder, and multiple times is going to make that light change, right?
Why can't Sammy Sosa speak English? He's played baseball here for, what, 15-16 years? He's on the edge of breaking records, and can't string together a decent sentence in the language of the country that pays his so damn well?
What drugs are the ad execs at Burgery King on? And why have they suddenly started sharing their stash with the ad execs at Wendy's?
Why, out of the six gazillion shopping carts available, do I always get the one with the wheel that doesn't work? And why does the person who is, for some reason, following me one aisle over, get the one with the squeaky wheel? And how does one little plastic bag of food cost $40??
These questions and more, on the next "As the Shell Turns".
So, while deleting the umpteen spams in my mailbox, many regarding a great little pill that will increase the size of my "manhood", a similar question occurred. Well, how does it know? It dissolves into the bloodstream and goes to the right place. Right? But I've got other dangleys, as well. I call them fingers and toes. Do the consumers (read morons) who take these things end up with fingers twice their size, looking like Jack Skellington? Guess that gives credence to the old lie about big hands and feet, eh?
While playing City of Heroes, another thought crossed my mind. Why do all superheroes wear spandex? Is it THAT comfortable? And, if so, why aren't we all wearing it?
How about when the batteries are about to die in the remote? What do we do? We mash the buttons harder, and shake the remote at the TV, as though the extra little shrug will help.
Similar thing with elevators. We push the button and wait. If it doesn't come soon enough, we push it again. The light is on... The elevator will come when it gets there, and pushing the damn button again won't do any good! We know this! Why do we still do it? And why, do others walk up and join us in our wait, and reach down and push the call button? They can see the button is lit. Is this some kind of anti-social unspoken symbol that says, "Hi, I'm waiting too." We know you're waiting!!
Same with crosswalks. Pushing the button harder, and multiple times is going to make that light change, right?
Why can't Sammy Sosa speak English? He's played baseball here for, what, 15-16 years? He's on the edge of breaking records, and can't string together a decent sentence in the language of the country that pays his so damn well?
What drugs are the ad execs at Burgery King on? And why have they suddenly started sharing their stash with the ad execs at Wendy's?
Why, out of the six gazillion shopping carts available, do I always get the one with the wheel that doesn't work? And why does the person who is, for some reason, following me one aisle over, get the one with the squeaky wheel? And how does one little plastic bag of food cost $40??
These questions and more, on the next "As the Shell Turns".
posted by Turtle at 10:27 AM
1 Comments:
Um, those 'little plastic bags' are so expensive because they aren't really oregano.
hee hee
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