Note to self....

I took Sheeps out shooting, this weekend past. She'd never held a gun, yet alone fired one. For safety's sake, I thought she should at least know how.

I gave her a quick lesson on types of firearms, different calibers, etc. A quick lesson on how to shoot, and then I had her a loaded pistol and pointed her downrange. She fired off a clip, and we bopped down to inspect the target and see how she did. All of her shots were fairly low on the silouette target. I explained that she really needed to aim for center mass, and was ready for a lesson on aiming. She explained that she was aiming for the crotch. Ahem.... "Well...., you hit it. With all rounds." Ouch.

Hide the keys to the gun cabinet from this woman, and never, ever make her angry!

Oy....

So, yesterday, I had one of those oh, so very rare things called a day off. I spent it, mostly, doing absolutely nothing. I did get a haircut, but that was about the only productive thing...

As a point of reference, the Independent Florida Alligator is the local college newspaper.

I'd left my cell phone at work the day before, and needed to run in and get it. While at the shop, two of my employees seemed a bit distressed. "What's wrong?", I mistakenly asked. They were worried, as there was a serial killer on the loose in Gainesville. "What??" Oh, no, not again! Danny Rolling put a major scare into this town back in '90. We definitely don't need this! "Yeah, according to the Alligator, they found five bodies since last Tuesday! You and T need to go out and catch this guy..." Oh, man, 5 bodies found in one week! Just like last time.... Wait. The Alligator? "Was that in today's Alligator?" "No, I think it was Tuesday's...." Heavy sigh. "The Alligator is running an series, on Tuesdays, celebrating 100 years of publication. They've been reprinting articles from the last 100 years. That one is from 1990, just like it says right at the top of the page there..." Shows how well my employees pay attention to detail.

Damn. Now I need to run to the hospital and get the rythym of my heartbeat reset.... Just as soon as I stop by the house and change my underwear... The bozos...

The Exam That Ate My Brain!!

On Monday, I was tasked with attending the Certified Food Manager training and exam. Even though we don't actually prepare foods at our shops, we still must have a CFM at each location. I've put off going to this thing for over a year, but with the inevitable opening of our 3rd location, it was time.

I've been told that the class itself was basically unnecessary, and that one need only attend the half hour review session beforehand to be able to pass. Well, the paperwork verifying my registration strongly suggested against this very action. They highly recommend taking the entire 8 hour course. The company that provides said training is very proud of the fact that 96% of their students pass the exam. Little wonder.

The paperwork said to show up at 2:30. The woman on the phone said the review session started at 2.... I showed up promptly at 2pm, ready for the review. Imagine my surprise upon walking into the room to see a roomful of folks... taking the exam. Not reviewing. The instructor informed me that they had finished the review section and were already 15 minutes into the exam. Eh, what the heck. I'm here, it's paid for, might as well jump in, and hope for the best.

I filled out the bubble sheet. I got my exam packet. The instructor told me if I had any questions he'd be more than happy to help out. He said that he'd give me clues to help me remember the correct answer. I reminded him that I missed the review, and he said to just circle my answers in the workbook, and not on the bubble sheet, and he would check it to see how far off I was.

I opened the exam packet. Wow. It didn't really matter that I'd missed the review. Anyone with at least 2.3 ounces of common sense could pass this exam. The questions were rather obvious. "Which of the following is an unsafe food practice? A: Storing food in approved food storage containers at a temperature of less than 40F; B: Sanitizing food preparation surfaces; or C: Storing open containers of chemical cleaners above open bags of flour." Ummmm...... C????? Seriously. The majority of the exam were questions like this.

I finished in about 10 minutes. I got the instructor's attention, who came over and picked up my workbook and went over it. He asked me "Did you have an answer sheet in front of you?" Seems I missed 3 questions, out of 80. Those 3? He corrected in the workbook. For me. No lie. We now see why 96% of the people pass. I worry about that 4%...

I then transferred my answers to the bubble sheet, and turned everything in. The other instructor seemed surprised when I handed her the workbook and answer sheet and said that I was very fast. Seems that I was the 3rd person finished. The rest of the class, who had all been there since 9am, were still taking the exam. I came in 15 minutes late, with no training or review, and finished the test before the majority of the people who'd been in training all day. Wow. I wanted to get a list of restaurants that they all worked at, to ensure I didn't eat there.....

All said and done, I am now a Certified Food Service Manager. Yippee.