Steve is Angry!

No, not this Steve... You'll have to go see "Over the Hedge" to understand. And you really need to understand... 'Cause it is funny.

Sheeps was up this weekend, as she is most weekends, and since this is one of our last weekends out together for a while (nothing like that... she's having back surgery, and will be O.O.C. for a while....), we decided to catch a flick before going out to a nice dinner.

The big choices were "DaVinci Code" or "Over the Hedge". I've been an OTH fan for years, but enjoyed the Brown novel as well, so I could go either way, and Sheeps really didn't care either. Utilizing that seldom used facility called logic, I decided that DC would be the "popular" movie, and therefore hardest to get tickets to, be the most crowded, etc. Seeing that it is "controversial" and the serious bible-thumpers are picketing the show, everyone and their mother would be lining up to see it. I'd read the book (Sheeps has it, but hasn't read it yet) and so already knew the storyline. For some reason, we always end up seeing dark, forboding movies together. They've all been good, mind you, but dark. And foreboding. Talking animals it was.

Like I said, funny. Very funny. Don't lose yourself in the "it's a cartoon" mindset. Plenty of jokes for the adult viewer. The comic strip has always been aimed more at the adult sense of humor, anyway. (Check it out at www.comics.com). Being an adult male, I howled at one particular piece of visual humor (with accompanying sound effect), but was, apparently, the *only* adult male in the theater, as I was the only one laughing. You'll know which part, when you see it. (If you're a man....)

Being a "turtle", I should have associated with Verne, the steadfast, cautious, quasi-leader of the group. I've always liked Verne, and can understand him, completely, but I've also always been a big Hammy fan. The same holds true in the movie version. Hammy is the man. Or the squirrel.

If you see only one movie this year... it won't be this one. But if you do manage to escape reality a couple times, do yourself a favor. Grab a can of Spuddies and go see Steve. Er. Over the Hedge. You'll be glad you did.

Just when you thought it was safe...

... to go back into the gene pool......

::sigh:: My employees.... ::sigh:: I was starting to think we had a fairly decent crew.... ::sigh::

The drawer at the Hunter's Crossing location has been short every day this past week. Every day. By $40. At first, we suspected theft, but upon review, realized that we've had different employees working there last week, so either they were all in on it, or something else was wrong.

After some investigation and review, we found the problem. It was employee related. It was less an intent of theft as it was more the onset of group stupidity.

It seems that a customer came in, ordered quite a few drinks, and then didn't have their credit card on them. They knew the number, though... Continuing on with the tradition of my employees being as sharp as a bag of nickels, they took the number and manually plugged it into the credit card machine. To make matters worse, they rang it in as a credit, and not a sale. So, thanks to my barista monkeys, the customer got $20 worth of coffee, and $20 credit added to their card. We paid them to drink our product. Nice. To make it even better, this customer has come in every day this week, and done the same thing. Unethical of them, yes, but can you blame them?

::sigh:: I want to bang my head on the desk, but it only serves to dent my forehead, and really annoys the desk.....

Follow up to the schedule from hell....

Well, I worked the shift on Friday for my employee, so that he could have off...

I was supposed to head down to Gathering of the Clans, as my Sheeps was expecting me, not to mention my fighting household. The problem? I just got a new engine installed in my Jeep. I'm not supposed to take it above 50 mph for the first 500 miles. That would make the trip a bit interesting..... In addition, I seem to be having some acceleration issues with it. It doesn't seem to have any "pep" when accelerating. I'll have to get it back in the shop to have it looked at. But I digress... It was determined that I could take the shop van down, which solved my problem. The key was at the main store, as was the van. I'd just stop by on my way to the bar, toss my armor and gear into the van, take the van to the bar, and leave right after work.

Well, I ended up working later than planned, and then had some packing issues, so I didn't get over to the shop before I had to be at the bar. No problem, I'll just head to the shop after the bar, and leave a few minutes later than planned...

I got out of the bar at just after 3am, so was making good time. I got to the shop and was heading to the door to go inside and get the van key, when it hit me.... I'd loaned my shop key to an employee so that he could open the store on Saturday.... Crap!! But wait! I remembered seeing a key to the 13th Street store while I was at the other location across town.... So I drove over there, let myself in, got the key, drove back across town, opened the store, got the key, switched out vehicles, and was on my way. An hour later than planned.

I arrived at the site at 6am, parked the van and headed for the cabin. To heck with the gear; it'd wait 'til morning.... Well, later that morning..... I found the cabin, found my bunk, complete with Teddy Sheep, and passed out. A couple hours later and it was up and at 'em time.

Between the ungodly heat, the lack of sleep, and the illegal blow I took on the back, I got rather naseous, so cut out pretty early. Then it was lunchtime, which was kept light, as it was too hot, and I still didn't feel very well. After that, I had to take over marshalling the fights, well into the afternoon. Then I had to get showered and dressed, as I had to sit up in court. Their Majesties requested the presence of all reigning Barons and Baronesses, for the duration of their reign. Sigh. Court was over soon enough, and I was thinking naptime! But no. We were expected to sit at high table during feast, so I had to get ready. I did catch a very short nap in between, but just for a few minutes.

Feast was quite lovely, and we actually ate until we were stuffed. Usually, you'll find one or two things you really like, and a few you don't, so you actually end up walking away hungry. Not so this one. Everything was great and we were quite full. But I was then exhausted. Sheeps told me to go take a nap while she helped to clean up the feast hall. I would've pitched in, but was just too tired to argue, so away I went. I waddled back to the cabin and finally crashed, but quested my squires, camped outside, to wake me in a couple of hours, so I wouldn't miss any fun....

How fast 2 hours flies... My zone alarm went off, and I awoke to find a squire hovering over me. I joined the gang outside, and had a nice time, sitting around telling NSTIW stories. I don't usually mind sipping a cold beer with the guys, but I still hadn't caught up on my hydration from the day, so I stuck to water.

We talked of many things (though I'm fairly certain we didn't talk about shoes, or ships or sealing wax....) and the conversation turned to Guam. Guam?? Yes. What the hell do you call someone from Guam?? We debated this at some length, and came up with some very interesting answers. It turns out that Guamanian is correct, but I am fond of Guamish.... The conversation petered out and we headed to bed, as I was stll tired.

Morning came too quickly, and we go up and packed and headed for home, wherein I headed for work. It was a verrrrry long evening, as I still hadn't caught up on my rest, and was all I could do to make it through the night...

Monday morning also came far too soon, as the "bitching calls" started early. I was chewed out for not ensuring that all shifts were covered properly during the weekend. Now, if you recall from my previous post, that I went to great lengths to get all of those covered, so I'm a bit confused. Then it came down to the opener on Sunday morn not having a key. I'd specifically left a key in the register drawer for her, and left a message where it was. Apparently she didn't get that message. I found out tonight that she did, indeed, get the key on Saturday eve, so what's the problem??

Well, the problem is that the owner of the shops, "A", is bipolar, and is on one of the downsides of her moods right now. For some reason, I have become her favorite target of late. She is looking for things to bitch at me about. That's fine, as I work my ass off around here, and have my ducks in a row, so let her bitch. I'll just continue to shake my head, sigh heavily, and explain to her how she is wrong. The good part of this is that she is not taking her angst out on the employees, but only on me. That's saves them the unnecessary grief. And an upswing shouldn't be too far around the corner, so I'll just grin and bear it until then.

The Schedule from HELL....

Ugh. Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun. Yay. Yippee. Ugh.

I just finished the work schedule for the coffee shop. It should have been done on Monday. No later than Wednesday afternoon, anyway. Here it is Thursday night, and I just got it done.

Here is a small part of my nightmarish world:

Three employees have gone home for the summer.
That leaves me with 14 to cover both shops. Eight shifts a day between the two.
Four of those are new employees, who really can't work alone.
Seven have requested Friday off, six of which want the entire weekend as well.

Let's go back to the part where I have 8 shifts to fill? Seven from 14 is 7.... Ugh.

I'll be covering a shift myself, then heading out to the bar, as it is the last friday before spring semester is over. It'll be insane. As soon as I am finished there, at oh-dark-thirty in the morning, I need to hit the road and head 2 hours south for an event that I must attend. Then it is back to the shop on Sunday, to close, as I have no one left to do it....

Two more leave next week for the summer.

Hello, desk. This is my forehead. Time for you two to meet.....

You don't have to call me darling, darliiiiiing!

As previously mentioned, in posts long buried in dust, as a bartender, one hates to hear one's name shouted by complete strangers; strangers who seem to think that all the other customers clamboring for drinks will mystically disappear by said annoying utterance. They'll hear my regulars say my name, and take it as a privilege to use my personal moniker. Au contraire, mein goombas! Not so! It is made even worse when said violators are horrible tippers....

Wednesday is a huge 'specials' day at the bar, which is why it tends to be one of the busiest nights. One of the specials is $2 wells, in whatever form you tend to imbibe it. Pretty good deal. Most folks will get a double for $4, and tip a buck. Not so bad.

One group of young "gentlemen" were ordering well shots, eight of 'em at a time. Eight shots for $16 bucks is not a bad deal at all. They tipped a buck. For all eight. I gave them a second chance, and the next round, eight shots, brought a $1 tip.

No more! They were wasting too much of my time, and not showing the proper generosity to afford said time, so they were cut off. They screamed and hollered for more shots, for the better part of an hour. They did not get the hint. They tried to get my barback to serve them. He politely informed them that he was strictly a "beer guy" and couldn't help them.

Then they heard my named called by one of my regulars, and proceded to shout it, loudly and repeatedly, to no avail. After 15 more minutes of them shouting my name, I calmly walked over and informed them that they weren't allowed to use my name, as it was "reserved for my family, friends, and customers who tip 20% or better"....

Believe it or not, it took them another 15 minutes to figure out that they would not be served again....

I weep for our future.....